Sounds of Fear

Christopher Loar, Sound Designer for (un)afraid and Ensemble Member of NYNF

So today I have been sitting in my cozy little chair with my headphones on, testing an re-editing sounds, drinking coffee, eating, and enjoying the fact that I have no cell phone reception down here.

For once, I am offstage, in the land of the sitting down and the watching and the taking notes. And it's enjoyable! I don't have to wear no costume! I don't have to learn no lines!

But I do have to make and tweak and tinker with sound. Which means my ears have been in headphones more than they usually are, which is a lot.

The Living Theater is a beautiful space. One feels so removed when descending into the space. I could live down here. People do, in fact.

Other than Too Much Light Makes The Baby Go Blind, I've never designed sound for theater before. I love sound and I love making it. And Ableton Live is a dream of a program to work with.

The sounds I make for my plays in TML are indeed often strange, but never I have been called upon to compose such strange things, such as:

"I need a cat going into a grinder . . . a machine . . . a machine grinder . . . going into nuns"

or

"Sex into death. Porno sex into total murder."

or


"white noise. And Blue noise. Lots of white and blue noise."

What can I say about this show? This was the first "run thru" of the show I've seen, and true to the Neo aesthetic of Chance, Change and Chaos, the order of pieces is random (like tml) only it's determined by a ouija board, or more accurately, a ouija board possessed by a different spirit every night.

I must admit I was skeptical. But I think it works! It leaves me wanting more.

And for a show looking at fear, there is much comedy. Much funny. Much fun.

Gets me thinking about the nature of fear and the thin line between all our feelings.

HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM.


Well, it's time for pizza.

A long day at the theater

(un)afraid has descended into the Living Theater!
Life is beautiful and challenging
as we build the insanity of the (un)show.
So we open in just a few days and are putting the finishing touches on things and initial touches on other things as well.
We are rolling out the carpet and turning down the lights, join us, join us if you dare...

From (un)afraid's "minion" Nicole: A four letter word that starts with "F"

In the last few weeks, the word 'fear' has taken a front & center seat in my life. The reason for this is because I'm in this wonderfully amazing show called (un)afraid with the New York Neo-Futurists. The show is about fear but I will reference the amazing creators of this show as they have explained it a bit more elegantly than I: "(un)afraid is an exploration of the concept, causes and consequences of our greatest fears, individually and as a society." Each show Jill, Dan, Cara & Ricky will explain, embrace & confront many different types of fear. I applaud them for what they are doing. Fear, especially personal fear, is not an easy thing to grasp or wrangle with or even talk about.

Fear is a pretty powerful word and emotion. At some point (or at several hundred) in our lives, we have felt it, possibly faced it or dealt with it, ran away from it and maybe even just laughed in its face.

I don't easily get scared, save for the occasional startle or random unknown occurrence, but I consider that nothing more than being scared. Fear is much more powerful. When someone fears something, that person has a much deeper emotional attachment to whatever it is they fear. Fears are based on belief. You can not tell a person their fears are unwarranted, much like you can not tell a person that there is no Santa Claus or Heaven or Loch Ness monster...if they believe it exists. There are common and shared fears in our nation and throughout the world, but fears are always personal, almost private in a way. Because of this, I don't believe fears are easily overcome because most stem from an experience/setting/person that triggers a part of your soul. That moment, that trigger, is what stays with you and keeps you believing in that fear - that harm or ill-will or death or whatever will come your way from whatever it is you fear. Because of this, people don't ever want to face or challenge their fears because, to a fearful person, THAT is worse than death. And that is why fears will always be with us. That's is what keeps fear alive.

I don't fear many things - just the usual fears of failure, embarrassment & humiliation, a slight fear of drowning, a much stronger fear of reality television and a fear of anything that the ghostbusters can't kill. But these ''fears'', except for the ghostbusters one, I consider to be more like obstacles and self-improvement type things that I could maybe work on and overcome. Maybe. They aren't things I fear...well the drowning one I sort of do... I just get frightened, scared, or find them completely intolerable.

I think the one thing I truly fear is people. Just like fear, people are unpredictable and unknowing. You never know what they will do or say or not do or not say. People can hurt you, physically, mentally & emotionally. Most people can't be trusted. Look at the state of our world. Yes, there are good people and good things being done & said but I can't help but dwell on the recent horrific events resulting in all the suicides & bullying all because of people's sexual orientation. Or the fact that 2 guys starting fighting over their dogs and one stabbed the other to death. Or that people abuse animals and the elderly & throw babies in trash cans. Those are people I fear. Because they are the people I have to share the planet with.

Fear. It's just like people. You never know what will be just around that corner...a baby in a trash can?

(un)afraid vlog #2